Population Unknown
by steubec
Summary: Vic after the end of Population 25. Slight spoilers. This is my first time writing fiction. Thanks for reading.
1. Chapter 1

I walked away from my Catholic upbringing a long time ago and left praying behind with it. But I had never felt more desperate than I did racing up that hill in his rig. I prayed harder in the 120 seconds it took to reach that driveway than I had my entire life up to my first communion. These had been the longest two minutes of my life.

How the hell did I get here? To this point, in this place, with this man? My head was spinning and not just from the concussion I was sure I had suffered. The helmet had done little to protect me from that baseball bat. My stomach churned as I threw open the door and proceeded to throw up the last remaining contents of my stomach. The dizziness overtook me and I fell over. I tried to push myself up but my arms failed me. I couldn't beat the physical or emotional agony into submission.

Oh my God...Shaun. I just left him there. He was beaten as badly as I was, if not worse and I just left him back in that car. He tried so hard to be tough for me in there, to be someone I could count on. Still, he isn't a cop. He even knew before he saw how much danger we were in that he couldn't handle it on his own. That's why he had called Walt. He's never experienced anything close to what he did today. He's not trained for it. He wasn't prepared. He needs me to take charge and get us medical treatment, help him process what has happened, call for backup to take care of whatever was waiting up that driveway. That is what I do, who I am. Yet I left him all alone.

I knew it was not the job that had pulled me back up that hill. It was the man. When had my boss become more important than my husband?

Then again, why am wasting time trying to kid myself into believing Shaun is still the most important man in my life? I left him behind a long time ago too. I had just never realized why. Over the last few hours it is beginning to become more clear to me. I am aware that I am likely not the only one gaining that insight. The defeated look in Shaun's eyes when he realized that I was going back was not enough to stop me from adding to his pain.

What I really don't know now is what will happen to my pain when I am finally able to open my eyes and stand up.


	2. Chapter 2

**I have had the first part written for several days but had a hard time deciding where to take it from there. This pulls in some from the books. **

* * *

"Vic..."

"I turned my head away from the bright light breaking past my eyelids. The normal sound of blinds being raised was deafening to my ears.

"Vic sweetheart, it's your big day. Time to wake up."

This cannot be right. That voice should not be here.

"Mom?"

"Of course, who else would it be?"

Tell me this is not happening.

"What time is it? More importantly, how did you get in here?"

"It wasn't too hard to talk the manager into letting me in, especially when I told him you weren't answering your phone and that we didn't want you to be late to your own wedding."

I struggled to sit up.

"What time did you say it was again? The wedding isn't until 4."

My studio apartment allowed me a view of her puttering around in the kitchen from my bed. She was starting a pot of coffee.

"Vic, your my only daughter. God knows with the time I had getting you raised I thought this day may never come. Surely you won't deny me my proper Mother-of-the-Bride privileges including a morning at the spa with you, a relaxing manicure and pedicure followed by seeing you with an actual hairstyle."

"Mom, Shaun proposed while I was in uniform, gun at my side and my hair in a ponytail. We don't want him to think he is marrying an imposter."

"That is only because you never stopped working long enough to allow him to ask at a better time. By the way, I brought a package in for you. It was sitting outside your door. I imagine your groom didn't want to bring on any bad luck by delivering it in person before the ceremony. He is so sweet, I cannot imagine how you kept from scaring him off."

She gestured to the table where there sat a box wrapped simply in white paper with a large red bow.

She's right, Shaun is a great guy! After that whole Gorski affair, finding out he was married and crooked to boot, I am thankful to have found someone as steady as Shaun to spend the rest of my days with. No more sneaking around on company time. No more games that became progressively more dangerous. No more lies and manipulation. I walked over to the table and read the small card tied onto the ribbon. "Forever yours" was written on it in small script. I froze for a moment. The handwriting didn't belong to Shaun.

I started to become dizzy and lost my balance. Grabbing the edge of the table to keep myself from falling I heard my name from a distance as through a fog.

"Vic, are you alright?"

"Vic?"

"Vic!"

Everything went black.

* * *

I can't remember the last time my head hurt so badly. I'm not sure it ever has. Gunshot and knife wounds are bad enough but when your head feels like this it's brutal. It hurts to see, to hear, to think. I fight to remember where I am. Wasn't I just in Philly with my mother? I was getting ready to marry Shaun. I shook my head to try to clear my thoughts. It only made things more jumbled.

Once again I found my eyes fighting against the light in the room as I slowly become aware of my surroundings. The hospital. A place I have come to know well over the years.

The day starts to come back to me. The whole long, horrible day. No, I can't go through that now, though I know I will. Instead the end keeps playing over and over in my mind. Walt told me to go with Gorkski. Walt told me it was okay. Then like the man he is he stayed behind, sacrificing for others once again. What was he thinking? How could he expect me to trust that son-of-a-bitch? Then I realized Gorski is not the one Walt wanted me to trust. He expected me to trust him, which I did completely. Otherwise I would have rather taken my chances with those psychos than leave in that car. So once again I am safe and he is...

Where's Walt!?

"Walt"

"He's not here."

I forced my eyes open to see my husband sitting in the chair next to the bed. I took a long, deep breath.

"Are you okay? You should be you lying down. They beat you pretty badly with that bat."

He wouldn't look at me but kept his eyes steadily focused across my bed at the wall beyond. It was only a minute or two before he spoke again, though it seemed like hours.

"The doctor and nurses couldn't understand why you weren't waking up. They wanted me to sit and talk to you because they thought you would be able to sense I was close and it would help draw you back." He paused. "I couldn't bring myself to tell them your husband wasn't the one you were searching for."


	3. Chapter 3

**I wanted to get this up before the episode airs tonight. Hopefully it was not too rushed. Thanks Craig Johnson for creating such great characters.**

* * *

And it's out there.

The interesting thing about words is that they change everything forever. Thoughts are very powerful and can shape actions and relationships without the knowledge of other people. Still, we can change our minds, modify our thoughts and beliefs and no one may ever know anything was different. Not so with words. Words cannot be hidden. Words cannot be rewound. They can build up or tear down in the smallest increment of time.

Shaun used words to express what he came to truly know up on that mountain. Something he never really wanted to know. We've danced around this conversation before but this time there will be no more avoidance or logical argument to explain it away. It is impossible to ignore what has happened and there is no going back.

I cannot imagine what Shaun must be feeling right now but I know what I am feeling: fear, guilt and to be honest, a little bit of relief.

"Shaun"

He shook his head seemingly to himself. "How did we get here? I really thought moving us out of Philly would help. You know, a fresh start, new scenery. But things have only gotten progressively worse. What happened to us? We were so in love. I don't know what to do anymore. I really thought a long weekend away together would give us a chance to reconnect and remember what drew us to each other in the first place. But it nearly killed you to be away from work for even one day. I know there is a lot going on, but I naively believed our marriage was more important to you than anything else. Now I know it wasn't the job but something else. I'm such an idiot."

"That's not fair. You knew how important my work was to me before we ever got married. Being a cop is practically the Moretti family business. Our whole house revolved around the job. It gave me something to bond with my father about and something else to argue with my mother about. I don't think I could ever be anything but a cop."

He wouldn't let my feelings toward Walt go. "You know, your mother warned me about this the night before our wedding after your brothers whisked you away to your 'bachelorette' party. She cautioned me to not let your job pull you away from me. She even admitted to her affair. I knew there was resentment between your parents but I honestly never thought that would happen to us. So how long have you felt this way toward your boss? Does he know how you feel?"

"Shaun, no. I didn't know how I felt until that body bag hit the floor in the bunker. When I thought Walt was dead I completely lost it. I should have been able to stay calm, let my training take over but instead I freaked. I never asked for this to happen. I think we were both left alone too much. Your work takes up as much time as mine especially with your trips out of town. Then when you were around you expected me to just leave my responsibilities and cater to your schedule. So we fought, a lot. The make-up sex was great, but how long did you think we could manage that kind of relationship without there being some kind of damage to ourselves and to each other? I tell you that nothing has happened between Walt and me. I got that being stupid crap out of my system before we got married when I ended things with Gorski."

"For some reason I believe you. Actually it's more that I believe Walt. How sad is that. He said I didn't have anything to worry about when I showed him that photograph a few weeks back. I don't think he would lie to me. Honor seems to run too deep in his soul. Damn, I still cannot believe how he got us out of there. I mean, I knew when you were gone for so long and I saw Gorski in that car that I couldn't handle the situation. Hell, I'm not a cop, never wanted to be. I honestly thought Walt would be the best chance I had of getting you back in one piece. It's ironic that bringing Walt into the situation resulted in my losing you."


	4. Chapter 4 - Where do we go from here?

**Great episode this week. I am so glad the divorce papers have been delivered and signed! Thanks for reading.**

* * *

Once again I am questioning myself. I feel like such a pansy hiding out in Walt's office while Branch is roaming the countryside looking for someone to shoot. I should have never allowed anyone to get in the way of my duty. Never would have before. I would have been out there looking for Branch and Ridges, doing my job, helping Walt. But instead I have allowed the unfamiliar feeling of fear to win out. First, it was with Gorski's stalking bullshit. Then, just as I was really starting to feel like myself again Shaun and I ended up in Chance's compound of crazy. Now I've come full circle and have got another wacked out cop who wants my ass, and not in the good kind of way. It would almost be nice to be back in Philly dealing with regular run of the mill homicides: botched drug deals, drive by shootings, robberies gone bad. No survivalists, no deranged cowboys and Indians. No stoic, old fashioned sheriff.

So here I sit dozing on the couch wondering how long I will allow myself to be captive before I tell Ferg where to shove it and head out to find Walt. Ferg told me Walt had heard from Nighthorse and headed out to arrest David Ridges, that he had been instructed to stay put and keep me safe. Sounds like a case of misplaced priorities to me. Once again, Walt is putting his life at risk by going it alone much like he did with Chance. Why does he keep doing that? Does he have a death wish? I know he is really torn up about Henry. I know that he still mourns for his wife. It is like he is trying to pay the debt for his sins in this world. Can't he see that he really does have reasons to live? That Henry and Cady care about him? That the people of Durant and the rest of this God forsaken county depend on him? That I need him?

The relief I felt in the hospital after my talk with Shaun had been short lived. The conversation changed nothing. And instead of continuing that talk like two adults, Shaun ignored it and I let him. It was easier than facing the truth. There was no more talk of our feelings, only his asshole demand I quit my job. He never said if it was the danger he wanted me away from or the man I worked for and I didn't ask. We simply slipped back into the same old song and dance. After that day, he never asked me again if I had given notice. I certainly wasn't going to mention it. I guess I shouldn't be surprised that he decided to have Walt deliver the divorce papers, but it was pretty passive aggressive if you ask me. I would have had more respect if he had been a man and told me himself but I'm sure he wanted to make a point. Then again, I knew after I got shot with that damn tranquilizer dart over a year ago that he could never compare to the man who now consumes my thoughts.

Sheriff Walt Longmire.

Gorski was one thing. He was fun, a little dangerous, a lot obsessive. It ended badly, but that wasn't my fault. When I was done, I walked away. I made the decision to change my future. After the IA investigation, I took that even further and walked away from my job and colleagues, everything I had ever known. Shaun was a haven of normalcy and when he first mentioned a possible move across the country to get me away from the cloud of distrust that was following me at work, I was a somewhat willing participant. To be honest, I had my fingers crossed it would be more Los Angeles and less Wyoming, but that wasn't where his company wanted to send him. Gorski was a magnet drawing me to him, but he never affected me like the Sheriff of Absaroka County. Shaun brought me to a place of some security, but not the warm sanctuary of safety I felt under the watchful eye of the strongest and most honorable man I have ever met. Signing the papers was a no brainer. I may never have a life with Walt outside of the office, but I can't continue the masquerade remaining with Shaun would require. I have never been that good of a liar.

I hear a key in the door and jump a little.

"Ferg?"

As the door opens I hear the familiar sound of boots on the wood floor.

"Nope"


	5. Chapter 5 - Here comes the sun

I glance at Vic as I walk into my office. She sits up pulling her feet under herself making room on the end of the couch. I sit down with a sigh, a little harder than I had intended. I lean my head back and close my eyes as I think back over the events of the last several hours.

Branch was right. David Ridges had been alive. And while his target had been Branch, now he had come after me. He meant to end my life. The only other person besides Ferg who had known where I was headed was Nighthorse. I needed to pay him another visit. After I was able to stop Ridges' attack it took a minute for me to catch my breath and decide what to do next. I figured I needed to move fast. I believed the medicine woman may have known all along that I was being set up so I didn't think returning to her camper was the best choice considering the circumstances. With no cell phone nearby to borrow, I started to walk out of there, hoping my rig had been abandoned within walking distance after it had been used to lure me out into the open unprotected. My guess was right. It was just over the top of the hill where I had first seen the white warrior on horseback. I radioed Ferg and waited for him to arrive. I wanted another department involved in processing the body. Especially since I was the one responsible for it being a body and not a live arrest. I'd used Ferg's phone to call the highway patrol myself. I gave them a statement over the phone and made an appointment to head out to their office the next day to answer any other questions they may have. I also made a courtesy call to Mathias giving him the short version of what had happened. We weren't exactly the best of friends but I believe it is in both of our best interests for him to know more fully what may be happening on the Res. On my way back into town. I saw Branch walking along the road. With a deep sigh I pulled over and rolled down the window.

"Branch, I found Ridges. You were right. He was alive."

He stared at me with narrowed eyes not saying anything.

"He's dead now. Hop in."

I know how important closure can be so I turned around and drove Branch back to Ridges. He seemed older than I as he climbed down out of the cab and walked over to where Ridges lay. I watched as he stood and stared at Ridge's body while Ferg ran point with the HP.

"Walt?"

I turn to Vic. She looks different to me somehow.

"I know you like to think and all before talking but you look like hell. Tell me some good news and I promise I will shut up and not make you talk for as long as you need."

"I'm alive."

"Was there a question about that?"

"David Ridges is not."

"No shit!"

"I killed him"

That apparently was enough for the questions to stop, at least for awhile.

We sat in an easy silence for several minutes before the need for more information got the best of her.

"Where's Branch?"

"My cabin. I ran by and picked up Lucian. Left him my Remington and instuctions to not let Branch go anywhere."

"Do you think that will work?"

"Branch knows his uncle is crazy enough that he would be happy to pull the trigger if Branch tries to leave. Besides, I think they would be good for each other right now. Branch certainly did not need to go back to Barlow's."

"What is going to happen to him?"

"Suspension. Contact the EAP and require he be cleared by a therapist before returning to work. That is assuming he wants to come back."

"What about the kidnapping"

"If Sam Poteet refuses to press charges, there is nothing else for me to do on that front.

I glance over at my desk as my thoughts change focus. I don't want to talk about Branch anymore. I don't want to talk about Ridges or Nighthorse anymore either.

"Where are the papers?"

She points her thumb toward Ruby's desk, stands up and walks over to the window. The morning sun falls across her face as she closes her eyes and breathes deeply. It appears it is her turn to hold her tongue. I cross the room and stand in close behind her. I lift my hand and move to place it on her arm and hesitate. Thinking better of it I stuff my hands in my pockets instead.

My voice catches in my throat. "How are you?"

Her body shifts as she crosses her arms. "It's hard to say; Changes from moment to moment." I wait for her to continue but she goes no further. I sense she is starting to close herself off.

"Vic, please don't shut me out."


	6. Chapter 6 - No more fighting

**This chapter is brought to you by last night's insomnia and may be the last in this particular story. However, I have found that writing helps to keep my serious Longmire obsession in check so there will likely be more stories to come. Hats off once again to creator Craig Johnson.**

* * *

All the nerve endings in my body are on high alert and I am finding it hard to keep my breathing steady. I can feel Walt's warmth push against me and we aren't even touching. This is proving to be more difficult that I thought. I swallow and focus my eyes on a tree across the street on the square.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Vic, I need to know that you're okay...Please."

It's the please that almost breaks me. The deep timbre of his voice vibrates down my spine and through my core causing a flutter of butterfiles to break loose in my stomach. He is standing far too close to safely turn around.

"I'm fine, really."

"Why don't I believe that?"

I am not sure what he wants to hear right now. Is he ready to hear that while a part of me grieves for the end of my marriage that a larger part of me is crying out for him? Does he want to know that when I thought that Chance had killed him I wanted to die too? Can he handle the guilt I know he will feel when I tell him that Shaun saw for himself the beginning of the end of our marriage in that moment? I can't be the source of more pain for this man who is already dealing with so much. I look to the floor hoping he accepts my silence as an answer.

Walt gently brushes the back of his fingers against my cheek.

"Vic"

I continue to stubbornly refuse to look at him. I don't know what to do which is unfamiliar territory for me so I do nothing. I feel rather than hear him sigh.

"I'm going to turn you around. Don't punch me."

He reaches around her to place his right hand on her left shoulder and steadily pivots her. A noticeable current runs through their connection. His hand remains there as he rests his left underneath her chin.

"Vic, I need you to look at me. Whatever it is, I will help you get through it."

He slowly lifts her face and their eyes meet.

* * *

My heart starts to beat faster as I slowly raise Vic's face and her eyes meet mine. The look in them touches me deep in my soul, in long closed off places. I try to recognize the emotions pouring out of them. At first they hold sadness and regret. Familiar emotions for me. They tell me that in spite of her lack of hesitation in signing the divorce papers that it has affected her more that she let on. Her look is palpable as she shifts her gaze from my eyes taking in the rest of my features, pausing on my mouth and then moving back up to rest once again on my eyes. Her defenses are slipping away and her eyes now communicate something else, long removed from recent experience yet familiar: affection, longing and desire.

I have always taken pride in my ability to read people. It is part of what has made me successful at what I do. But I cannot be reading Vic right, can I? I flash back to my wedding night. Though I had some experience in college Martha and I waited until marriage for anything much more than kissing. By the time we had worked our way through the wedding festivities and made it to Gillette for our simple if not short honeymoon we were both ready to burst. The look in Vic's eyes makes me feel the way Martha's had as we made our way though that clumsy, uncertain yet incredible night. Feelings of being wanted, cherished, and loved.

I close my eyes and hear Martha's voice. "Don't be an idiot Walt. I know you love me. Loving someone else doesn't negate that. You have mourned long enough."

I open my eyes when I feel Vic start to pull away. She looks embarrassed.

"Walt, I'm...

She stops talking as I pull her into me and lower my head toward hers. Our noses bump and I tip to the right sliding in and lightly brush her lips with my own. Not sure where to go from here I start to retreat. She moves forward, wrapping her hand around my neck and pulling me back to her. All hesitation gone, I stop fighting it and fully meet her kiss. After a few moments she loosens the embrace and lays her head against my chest with her arms around my waist.

As we stand holding each other I am not sure where we go from here, but I am certain we will figure it out together. Right now, together is all that matters.


End file.
